Hypochondria, or the lack of a better explanation...

I am going in to the doctor today to see why I am having the following symptoms:

I can't warm up. I have been cold for the past couple of weeks. I hate winter but I don't think this is a psychological issue. I have never had a problem with this before, even though I much prefer 95 degrees in the shade over winter.

I have been having chest pain. Primarily in the left side of my chest but sometimes it is my entire chest. It feels as if it is in the chest wall--I have been attributing it to a herniated thoracic disc that I have had problems with for years. My ribs sometimes hurt all the way around, though with this chest pain, not so much. At times it makes me think of the pain I experienced when I had gall bladder attacks, but that is impossible because that has been out for 13 years. Either way, I am getting that checked out more for Bill than me. I think it is nothing.

Sometimes the chest pain feels like it is in my shoulder. And in that left arm pit I have had a lump that comes and goes. I think it is a lymph node. Today, it is not noticeable, but sometimes it is quite sore.

I have had several bouts with vertigo just in the past few weeks. I experience it at least once or twice a month as it is, but it seems to have increased. I also have had double vision for years on and off--the MDs put it off to a muscle thing in my left eye, but it happens in both these days (no rhyme or reason to it).

I occasionally lose complete feeling in my left arm. I mean GONE. Bill didn't believe me once and pinched me as hard as he could and I felt NOTHING. (He did this with my blessing of course, he is not abusive!)

I have pain in my joints--more than a thirty-something should.

I have suffered from intermittent migraines forever. And if I don't have a migraine headache, it is likely I have some kind of headache at least for a little bit every single day.

I have had weird paralysis in my face and pain in my neck. It feels as though I can't move my jaw when it happens and of course it freaks me out some when it occurs. This hasn't happened a lot, but when it does it is bizarre.

I have a weird feeling sometimes, hard to explain...like I am disconnected. Hearing under water, like I may pass out. It also goes away so I haven't bothered to get it checked out.

My former MD kept testing me for MS due to many symptoms that couldn't be explained otherwise and he kept coming up empty. I kept passing the tests.

I have quit doctoring because like everyone else, I am thinking it is all in my head. I mean I am Bipolar after all, and I have a vivid imagination. And the minute that anyone sees that on your chart, they assume it's all in your head anyway.

So, I am certain after going through some testing (again) they will come up with absolutely nothing. I am going to discuss seeing a dietitian and finding a way to lose weight. I am certain that whatever this is (or isn't), it isn't helped by my weight.

I wish I could just skip it, feels like a big waste of time.

Okay, I am done with my bitch session...time for a quick nap.